A friend asked me why I loved Oreos so much to the extent of changing my twitter handle from my real name to TheLemonOreo and then went on to ask why I had particularly chosen that flavor.
I got a couple of similar comments from others too and some I answered extensively and some I just smiled and said ‘Oh no particular reason.’
You see the truth is I do not love Oreos that much and I have never even had lemon flavored Oreos before.
The real reason I changed my handle was because of two reasons. 1) I wanted an impersonal handle, something that could not be directly traced back to me. I have very unique name sorta I actually do have a few namesakes but it’s not a name you hear every day. In this age of hiring firms and companies looking up candidates online, the last thing I need is a scandal of any sort attached to my name in anyway.
2) Well, this is the main reason for this post.
So why Oreo? Why thelemonoreo? Is there even anything like a lemon oreo?
Firstly, yes, lemon oreos do exist. Proof? Way ahead of you.
Secondly, ‘thelemonoreo’ because someone had already take all the other cool oreo handles I wanted. The ‘lemon’ part came from a line in Drake’s ‘Thank me now’ song that I misheard, he said “I got flows for the Marilyn Monroe’s” and I could have sworn that I heard ‘lemon rose’. Please don’t ask. I cannot explain my weirdness.
Lastly, ‘Oreo’ from err, well, this requires a little flash back to SS1 days in high school. Someone saw my lame attempt at ‘busting some moves’ and said that I danced like a white girl. Flash-forward to sometime after my high school graduation, a friend Mfon told me I was an Oreo because in his words I was a black girl on the outside but a white girl on the inside. My life. *sigh*.
Flash-forward again to my second year in University, after I had met Nife and Uche. One day at faculty Uche and I were talking and I can’t remember how the topic even came up but I remember I mentioned that if I schooled abroad that I would probably start a rock band in my garage and then next thing we were talking about starting our own rock band and when deciding on a name, I told her the ‘Oreo’ story. We decided that Nife should be our manager.
Later on that day I started a conference chat with Nife and Uche told them my ideas, things escalated quickly and Nife agreed to be our manager as well as part time tambourine player, Uche said she would be the song writer and also play the drums (I think), I agreed to be the lead singer, co-song writer and guitarist.
Next thing we were talking name of hit songs and albums, our first album name and hit song would be ‘Can’t dunk this’, including other songs on the album like ‘Oreo hearts’, ‘twisted, licked and dunked by your love’ (my ideas ^_^), etc. Soon we were talking merchandise, our pictures on Oreo packs, milk cartons, lunch boxes, etc. Tours and shows at Glastonbury, Madison square, oh we had dreams.
The only problem was that we didn’t have what the most important thing, talent! Lol I don’t even know how to play a guitar or Uche the drums, and the closest we have ever come to a public performance is singing at Karaoke at Shaunz Bar in Murphy’s plaza.
Oh well, we have accepted now that we have an imaginary rock band. We are The Oreos and you can’t dunk this! *hammer dance*
I love my band members and fellow oreos because they are just so special and they share my vision for a rockband without questioning my sanity Lol.
Anyways, that is my side of the story. Now for Uche and Nife.
Uche: The Pink Oreo
Hi guys! So Chiz already covered the basics of pretty much how we started. People keep asking if the Oreo thing is a cult, seeing as I’m ThePinkOreo and our friend, Ebuwa also decided to adopt the GreyOreo for ourselves.
First of all, (introduction. I apologize. I can’t help how razz I am. I blame the Yoruba blood in me.) Yes. Where was I? Oh yeah, we’re not a cult o. We’re a fictional band. Since none of us has actual musical talent, we did capitalize on something we all shared, that’s love for music and literature. Ever so often, we’d write poems and send to each other, or talk about awesome music we’d found and dream a little about our (imaginary)kick-ass Glastonbury glory days. We’re an odd bunch.
Chiz is THE Oreo. She is a white girl on the inside and black on the outside. For real. Her white name is Tammy (a derivative of her name Chizotam), and I call her TamTam sometimes. Chiz loves “white-girl” music, she dances like a white girl, but she speaks Igbo like a ninja-I’m still hurt she’s refused to teach me Igbo, but it’s fine. Everyone who knows Chiz knows she’s the sweetest person on the planet, so it’s cool. (LOL Uche we both know my spoken igbo is a big mess).
Nife is a gentleman. It’s the one word that best describes who he is. Nife is an idealist, he is chivalrous, honest, caring and buckets of fun. Nife belongs to a class of young men that are a dying breed. What makes him an Oreo is he’s very different on the inside than what you assume on the outside. Some male friends of mine have told me Nife scared them at first, because of how buff he is. He looks like a macho man. And that’s true. He’s a tough guy, but he’s also the kindest, most thoughtful person you’ll ever meet and we love him plenty.
Now to me. How did I become ThePinkOreo? Duh, I love pink. Lol. But that aside, I think I am a bundle of contradictions. I have different sides to me and pink seems to be most apt because I’m such a softie on the inside. I project a hard exterior, being a real G and all B-), but really I’m a big baby and I can be such a girly girl, which is weird cuz I’m also a tomboy. I’ve also got some white-girl elements to me too, but we’ll leave that for another day. I’ve lost too many cool points already.
All in all, we’re different people but our similarities and differences are what bring us together. We still believe we will be soup-or-stars one day. Talent or not. I mean if Davi.. Oh look a bunny rabbit!
Well this was the part where Nife was supposed to come in but he’s too busy being our manager and booking us shows, hitting the gym, training to beat up obsessive fans, just the usual Nife stuff.
Anyone can become an Oreo. You just have to accept the fact that you are unique (some would say weird but I say variety is the spice of life!)
Do you think you have what it takes to be an Oreo?
Oops wrong picture x_x
Till next time, with peace and love from Oreoland,
Chiz, Uche and Nife
The Oreos :*